I'm sorry..

When was the last time you took off your glasses, stuff the pillow into your face and bawled your eyes out?

I'm sorry baby. I know these words are insufficient to counter what you're feeling now. Mixture of anger and frustration I guess.. Sadness? Maybe not.

Typing this makes me want to weep because I love you so much and yet I'm not capable of letting you know. I'm like a complete utter failure. The foundation of a relationship is letting your other half know that you love him and make him feel loved. And now, I don't think anything I say will make you believe me.

I don't think I can say 'give me some time to prove you' because I feel that I seem to be running out of time. I wouldn't blame you if you want to leave me. But just to let you know, I won't be giving up without a fight. I don't know how I'm going to do it, but I'll try my best.

Funny how our relationship blurred so thoroughly with our lives that before going to bed, we'll have our little ceremony over the phone and kiss each other good night. No matter how tired we are or how inconvenient it is for you, it'll still be done. Now can you imagine how it was like when you go Malaysia? Haha.. But thank god for SMSes.

No, I'm not over-reliant on you, nor is it a habit that can't be kicked. It's just something we've developed together to express crazy-head-over-heels love for each other. Nothing can bloody hell replace it. No one can bloody hell make me feel the same way I feel towards you.

I'm just really sad that I made you feel that I don't love you as much. Because it's not true. I love you terribly much. It really drives me crazy when you say such things.

Sigh.. I'm sorry baby.