l'amor che move il sole e l'altre stelle

alright, let me tell you the biggest achievement of my life. i don't think there will ever be another greater one than this. I WENT JOGGING! WITHOUT ANYONE NAGGING AT ME! and i jogged like 4 days in a row already! arhaha. okay fine, nothing glorious. anyway, i watched My Brother starring the absolute hottie, wonbin. he's like the hottest asian actor i've ever set eyes on. lol. really really hot. it was a sad movie. i only give it 5 over 10. cus it wasnt that intriguing. it was kind of predictable. i'm thinking of making a new layout but apparently i'm too lazy to think of ideas. maybe i should just slap some words and tada.

school's been fine i guess. lots of work. i don't exactly feel the stress cus i'm always laughing in class. don't ask what i laugh at. it's nothing actually. nothing, literally. though i listen in class but nothing seems to be going into my vacuous skull. lol. i'm such a dimwit. anddddd. i hate PE. i've always hated PE since primary5. it's ridiculous. i hate NAPFA and i hate weight-height taking day. it stinks to the highest heavens. i had PE today and we played frisbee. please tell me why the hell do people like running after a thin and light piece of plastic. when i see a frisbee, i think about dogs and parks. SO, i don't see the point of playing frisbee. and what makes it worse is that the forfeit for not being able to catch the frisbee is push-ups. what the fucking hell. but anyhow, i dropped it a few times but refused to do push-ups. lol. as always, i'm a bummer. jogging is fine, baseball and softball is fun. the rest is just plain stupid. thank god we didn't play basketball at all. if there's a sport i hate most, it has got to be basketball. i think i insulted quite a number of people but i dont bloody hell give two hoots. i'm such a bitch. lol.

many people asked me why i hate nearly everything and everyone. and i couldn't find an answer. maybe i've given up hope in this pathetic life some call wonderful. and i really detest people who try and motivate me by saying live your life to the fullest. oh shut the fuck up alright? living life to your fullest basically means you need to smoke crack and also be an under-paid social worker. i hate the way counsellors try their very best to "bring you back to the right track in life" and their endless advices. the only advice which is worth listening are usually not soothing to the ear. so why people want to waste their time to listen to something which probably had been repeated a few trillion times? my mom often have some depressing talks with me and she told me medical science is really a form of torture. okay here's what she was trying to say. for example someone's suffering from leukemia or brain tumour. and if you didn't know, there isn't a cure for cancer unless someone donates some parts such as bone marrow for leukemia. all cancer stricken people do is to pray that they'll stay in remission forever after their treatment like chemotherapy or hope that someone will have spare parts to donate et cetera. but why people put themselves through so much torment knowing that they'll die sooner or later? okay, so an optimist would say a miracle will happen. oh sure, like the cancerous cells will just dissipate suddenly. a patient goes through so much pain, and pay the medical fees for.. nothing. if i had cancer, i won't go for treatment at all. i'll just smoke weed everyday waiting for death. just think about how hard your family have to slog their guts out to pay for your medical fees knowing that you're not going to be cured completely. medical science is.. great i suppose. but it doesn't make sense to me. why are they giving the people empty hopes? i mean it's of course extremely upsetting to know someone around you actually has cancer but it's even more upsetting when you know there's treatment for it but it doesn't cure the person completely. it's so.. kill joy. i've read books on cancer patients and the side effects of chemotherapy (the only treatment i know for cancer) are really heart-wrenching. let me tell you, even if the person undergoing chemotherapy isn't someone you know, but the sight of them is really heart-breaking. especially when they're little kids. my heart really goes out to them because they cannot understand why they have to go through all that pain and have needles poking into them every single day. can you even imagine how their parents will feel seeing their child's face cringe in pain whenever a needle if poked into their little bodies? so young, yet suffer so much agony. if my child had cancer, i will kill my child to end his/her suffering even i'm aware that i'll be sent to jail for life or sentenced to death. i seriously wouldn't mind. ahh, life is cruel in some ways i guess but everyone has to go through with it.